Happy and coupled

I'm feeling like half of a committed couple for the first time in, oh, eight years? Between the ending marriage and the conflicted years and then the post-divorce stuff, this is the first time I am savoring the feeling of being so deeply bonded to someone I love.
Just saying those words "I love him," fill me with wonder that I am willing to admit and enjoy it without freezing in fear.
Of course, neither one of us believes in monogamy and sexual exclusivity for ourselves, so while we're not playing the field, we're not above playing (I realize some readers may find this hard to take). The lesson I've learned is that multiple relationships don't work for me in parallel, but that doesn't mean I'll never be close with anyone else again (and I domeanclose...)
Still, what C and I have is special and I am treasuring it.

Comments

[Amy Gahran]

Congrats! Just wondering, what do you mean by "multiple relationships don't work for me in parallel"?

- Amy Gahran

[suzannah]

Amy--
I mean that I tried to have two seperate serious relationships of fairly equal intensity at once and I couldn't make it work with those two people--so now I feel like part of my balance is not trying to have two serious ones--others can be more friend like, more fun, whatever--I'm not looking for a second person to be equal to the first, tho if that person came along, I'd want to make it work.